I gave my son a dose of his pain medication. I sat by him and waited patiently hoping the pain would go away. It's been a few hours and even though he had fallen asleep, I could hear him as he groaned painfully in his sleep. He shivered and I realized it was getting cold in the room. The freezing Minnesota winter weather isn't helping matters. I left the room to go grab a warm blanket hoping the pain medication would have kicked in by the time I return.
I came back into the room and slowly covered his trembling body with the warm blanket. He had woken up and I could see the pain clearly evident his eyes. The chronic pain would not let him sleep. He was trying hard to fight it with every movement of his body. It's depressing and exasperating that he was still in so much anguish considering the amount of pain medication he'd had to wolf down.
This situation has a way of rendering one helpless and the huge feeling of impotence can be frustrating. It is immense torture watching the pain ravage his skinny body. I had spent the night praying. The massages, pain medicines and the warm blankets weren't helping, so what next?. Most likely another couple of nights in the hospital. I held back the tears. It hurts not being able to do more to help after trying fruitlessly to innovate possible ways to conquer the pain. You're struggling to develop a strong backbone but the reality of the situation seems to be wiping out your effort. It's difficult when you have to roll with the hard punches as it seems to be out of your control.
He turned to me and smiled and said softly, "Mum, it's okay"
At that moment I sta